So won't the Middle-Aged Ladies Please Stand Up, Please Stand Up, Please Stand Up?

Yes, it’s true, at the last little music fest we went to this summer, a wonderful night of hilarity and good fun at the annual, most excellent Transperformance show (where local bands transperform as other bands within the context of a theme--this year's: Letters and Numbers, so we got to see U2, the Jackson 5, B-52's, KD Lang, XTC, X, ELO, P-Funk, and T. Rex) put on by Northampton’s Arts Council at the Pines Theater in Look Park, I found my courage, and danced. True, there were no spot lights on me, but I didn’t give the notion of embarrassing Luke a mere thought, and simply ran down the hill to the dance pit with some small friends where we jumped about to the B-52’s for a good lovely while. It felt good to shake the fanny again, find a little bit of sunshine in my soul, and not worry about the government. It’s always good to get your groove back, even if it’s just for a little while, and even if, as Feminem, aka Julie Waggoner and back-up crew, sang, crotch-grabbed, hot-flashed and strutted that night in The Middle Aged Lady, their brilliant rap-spoof of Eminem's The Real Slim Shady,

Madonna don't got any bit of jiggle when she dances

well I do, so bleep her and bleep you too!

You think I give a damn about my fanny?

A middle aged fanny is just fine, if you ask me.

Dancing was fun, but listening to The Middle Aged Lady took the mustard. Here's a sampler of some of the hilarious lyrics:

And all of us who once were young we still are young
Because we’re all alive & still workin’ it
And every single person is a Middle-Aged Lady lurkin
Workin at Burger King, serving you your onion rings
Or in the parkin lot, circling
Screaming "I’m burning upppp!"with her windows down and her radio up
So, will the real Ladies please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control and
one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

I'm a Middle-Aged Lady, yes I'm the real Lady
All you Baby Ladies are just imitating
So won't the Middle-Aged Ladies please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?

But you really need to watch the whole thing. Click here http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=6-DbQIzRVaQ for a real treat. And if you want the full, wonderful lyrical assault, let me know. Julie was nice enough to send the lyrics, alongside Eminem's.

It's always nice to know that you're not alone, that there are lots of other women out there who are dealing with whacky hormones, the burnin' up and hot flashin', and other glories of menopause, whether forced, temporary, or not. I'm still trying to figure out what mine is. All I know, is that "I probably got a couple hormones in my body loose, But better than being George Bush with my lips loose, Sometimes, I wanna holler ‘cause I’m older and I’m flashing Just like you other menopausal ladies: "It’s really hot in here! It’s REALLY HOT in here!”